"Feed the hungry, and help those in trouble. Then your light will shine out from the darkness, and the darkness around you will be as bright as noon. The Lord will guide you continually, giving you water when you are dry and restoring your strength. You will be like a well-watered garden, like an ever-flowing spring." Isaiah 58:10-11
I have been thinking about my "life" alot lately and as I often do when I am thinking about something, I thought I would look it up on dictionary.com. Well, for a very short four letter word, life as a noun has alot of definitions. Over 25 to be exact and if you are looking at it as an adjective and/or idiom then you get up to 36! I know, I know... I am amused by strange things.
So the first definition is as follows: 1. the condition that distinguishes organisms from inorganic objects and dead organisms, being manifested by growth through metabolism, reproduction, and the power of adaptation to environment through changes originating internally. Wow, that is mouthful! It is almost as if I need a definition for my definition. Anyway, when I got down to number 11 I was intrigued. Number 11 states: the course of existence or sum of experiences and actions that constitute a person's existence. Now, that was more like it. This is more along the line of what I have been thinking about. What is my life?
Our family is in the process of making some fairly significant decisions that would reshape our life as we currently know it. This unexpected opportunity has led me to ponder how my life became this zoo that I love so much. As I look back I can tell you that as a teenager I did not dream this life for myself. In fact ,I wanted just the opposite. I wanted a fast paced, successful career. I wanted a small family and lots of money for us to travel around the world. I wanted a big house and a cottage on a quiet lake and for my kids to never want for anything. My desire was to have a "successful" life.
Somewhere along the way though Jesus changed my heart's desire. He placed this fabulous man in my life who took my breath away. (My mom actually prayed Jason into my life but that is another post!) He was (and still is) this amazing musician and God had a hold of him and was calling him into ministry and He was my best friend in the whole world. He challenged me with ideas like "If we are Christians shouldn't our lives look so different to the outside world that people ask us why that is?" Well, we married on the happiest day of my life and bought our two crazy dogs and after a couple of years we had a son. His name was Liam. He turned everything upside down. I remember looking at him in the hospital and thinking I can't believe that God would allow us to be responsible to bring up this miracle. It was overwhelming. This little baby opened my eyes and my heart to think about what God considers important in a life and what He would want Liam to learn.
Well, over the years there has been more overwhelming experiences. At Ryerson camp we met all these great kids that were in the foster care system. Many of them did not know who Jesus was and were really not looking start a new relationship. For them relationships meant pain and loss and to talk about how God sent His only Son so that we could have a relationship with Him did not interest most of them a bit. God began to open our eyes to a whole community of children that had broken hearts which could only be repaired by the Creator of the Universe. The problem was that no one was telling them about Jesus in a way in which they would relate. God began to speak to our hearts about how He cares about the children who have no families. We began to see that God's people have the capacity to make a real difference in the lives of these children. So when Liam was three our family grew to include Daniel and Caroline through adoption. The process is an experience that has left us forever changed and forever blessed. The miracles that we have witnessed in our family can only be attributed to a God that loves us all.
Our most recent little addition to the family occurred almost two years ago when Trinity Joy bounced her way into our lives. She might be the smallest in our brood but her vocabulary grows everyday and what she lacks in size she makes up for in volume! From the moment that she was born she has made sure that everyone knows she is here to stay!
So in the midst of all these famly additions we have made some other significant choices. I made the choice to stay home with the kids and devote much of my time to leading worship for At His Feet Ministries. Jason went into full-time ministry as a worship pastor and we moved to Milton in order to be a part of starting a new church called The Sanctuary Milton.
Obviously in this post I can't describe all aspects of my life but as I reminisce and look forward to what could be a new chapter in our lives I am reminded of Psalm 37: 4 which says "Delight yourself in the LORD and He will give you the desires of your heart." My "life" thus far through the sum of my experinces as defined by dictionary.com has given me the desires of my heart. Not the desires I thought they would be as a young teenager but the desires that He has helped me to discover. I am looking forward to what is around the corner!