Brain Day - It's been 3 years

Great is Thy faithfulness, O God my Father;
There is no shadow of turning with Thee;
Thou changest not, Thy compassions, they fail not;
As Thou hast been, Thou forever will be.

Great is Thy faithfulness!
Great is Thy faithfulness!
Morning by morning new mercies I see.
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided;
Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me!

Nov 5th, 2008 - moments before surgery #1

October 2011 - Liam being Liam

There will never be words to describe how grateful I am for all the God has done on our behalf.  His faithfulness is never ever ending. 

Yesterday I Met Hopelessness

And to love Him with all your heart, with all your understanding, and with all your strength, and to love your neighbor as yourself, is far more [important] than all the burnt offerings and sacrifices.

~ Mark 12:33 

I met him yesterday.  I watched as he tried to speak to people but they either did not hear him or choose to not engage with this troubled man.  His clothes were dirty, ripped and torn,  His shoulders were slumped, his head lowered as he teetered back and forth precariously on the curb.  As I got closer to him I noticed that he wore both a large cross and a pentagram around his neck.  His cheeks were sunken in and he had large sores on his hands and face and I wondered when he had last received any medical attention.  Everything about this man was difficult to look at.  He looked beaten by life and without any source of hope.  I could not understand what he was asking me but then he abruptly stopped and pointed to the word "bible" on my book.  I tried asking him if he had ever read the bible but again incoherent words tumbled from his mouth.  He stopped and I asked him, "What do you need?"  He asked for money, almost falling off the curb and into the parking lot.  "I don't want to give you money but you look like you could use a coffee."  I said.  He still did not look up.  "When was the last time you ate?"  "How about I get you a meal."

When I came out of the store he was not in the same spot that I left him and I wondered if he had moved on.  But a second later I noticed him on the other side of the parking lot this time.   It took me a while to get him to understand that the meal was for him.  I got him to sit down on the curb and as I knelt beside him and opened his coffee lid and got his food ready for him,  I was at a loss as to what else I could do.  I tried again to ask him his name and to talk and ask about the bible hoping that I could offer him some encouragement and hope.  Strange and incoherent words again tumbled from his mouth and I am not sure if they were from his inebriation or if he was also mentally ill.  I finally left him there on the curb, in the sunshine, drinking his coffee and eating his chili.  As I walked away, I was praying that God would have mercy on this man.  Since that meeting yesterday his image is never far from my mind.  I wonder if I could have or should have done more?  Is there a way I could have shared the hope I have for my life that could have broken through his hopelessness?  Again I am left wondering how do I love my neighbour well?

Shine Your Light 2011

We showed off our new buttons - So fun!

It is the morning after the night before and everyone in my house is sleeping soundly except me.  Maybe I am just too excited to get this post up!

For the last four years in Milton, we have hosted Shine Your Light on October 31st.   So when we thought about what new traditions to serve our neighbours that we would start in our new house and city we decided that this would be an event we would have to continue.

We enlisted some friends from our Milton church and the plans began.  This year we added a new element to our night.  We handed out flyers to let our neighbours know about the event and that we would be collecting for the Mission Services Food Bank.  We also were able to use a popcorn machine and a cotton candy machine courtesy of Toronto Church Planting.  These were great, and a big hit with both kids and parents.  Our friend Annabelle Wilson has her own cake company called Simply Belle.  Well, she out did herself with amazing apple caramel cupcakes and a super fun spooky castle with working lights!  Jason, Liam and I along with our friend Mike played a little music on the front porch under the name the Hammer Hillbillies.  We even had someone ask for us to play one more after we had shut down for the night.  Costumes were a plenty and so was the laughter and smiles.  When all was said and done we had quite a few donations for the food bank and we made some new friends.  I will let the pictures speak for themselves but I think a new tradition has been born!

Michael - Our cotton candy chef

The cutest little cupcake we know!

Annabelle - Not only can she bake everything delicious but she can make popcorn!

Our Hillbilly debut!

Liam and his fav costume of Mr. Orangeman

Really I don't think you can even imagine how good these were!

The Crazy Castle with working lights! - And it tasted just as good as the cupcakes!

People in our neighbourhood

The sugar rush has begun for TJ and Maddi

These big blue eyes just melt my heart!

 Thank-you, thank-you to all our friends, old and new for helping us create a night of memories for our neighbourhood!  We are already thinking about how to make next year's Shine Your Light bigger and better!

Thankfulness

 I have been trying to get this post up all week.  It is Sunday night and I am determined that before the night is done this will be finished!

Last weekend was Thanksgiving and I have so much for which to be thankful.   We spent a beautiful weekend up at Jason's parent's cottage surrounded by extended family.  The colours on the trees were amazing and to top it off the weather was absolutely gorgeous.  We took our student Soo Gyeong Shin with us and she was very brave to try all sorts of new things, like canoeing, maple fudge, hanging out around the campfire and of course making s'mores.  This was her first Canadian Thanksgiving and I think it was a big hit!

Soo Gyeong's first canoe ride

Yummy Smores!

Last campfire of the season

One of my favourite moments of the weekend was when Jason and I took Soo Gyeong out onto the beach at night to look at the stars.  She was mesmerized.  She told us that in the city where she lives in South Korea that there is too much smog and too many lights to see any stars so she had never really seen them before.  She was enchanted by the night sky.   Her enthusiasm and child-like delight was contagious and I found myself being pulled into her joyful reaction. 


Afterwards, I was reflecting about how great and indescribable God really is.  How the Creator of all of those amazing beautiful stars is even more amazing because He sent His one and only Son as an atonement for the debt that I myself can never pay.  My heart was overwhelmed with thankfulness for that amazing sacrifice but also for all of those who He has placed in my life.


This past week in our family devotions we have been reading in Mark.  We were studying the passage in which Jesus' mother and brothers come looking for him.

Answering them, He said, “Who are My mother and My brothers?” Looking about at those who were sitting around Him, He said, “Behold My mother and My brothers!  For whoever does the will of God, he is My brother and sister and mother.” 

~ Mark 3:33-35

Over the past few years, this scripture passage has been revealed to my heart.  I have always loved my family as I am sure Jesus did too but there is something special about the family that God gives us.    There are those of you that have become that for me.  Some of you I have known for years and some of you I have met only once or twice but we have stayed in touch.  We have served together in church, at camp, in home church, mission trips and in other Kingdom projects.  The gifts and talents that God has blessed you with have inspired me.  We have laughed together, cried together, played together and studied God's word together.  You are my bothers and sisters.  You are a part of our family.  

Many of you have prayed for us.  Some of you I have never met in person but I know you are praying.  We have seen God do amazing things in answer to those prayers.  When Liam was sick in the hospital we would watch his monitors all return to normal readings when we would remind him of who had signed up to pray for him during that specific time.  It was such a miracle that even the nurses began to notice.  We have felt your prayer lately here in Hamilton.  God has been confirming to us that we are exactly where He wants us to be.  Some of you have taken on the responsibility to pray for streets in our neighbourhood and even our own street.  We are seeing Him at work.  (Watch Jason's update post on Tuesday for some exciting news) Your faithfulness to pray is an encouragement to us.  You are my bothers and sisters.  You are a part of our family. 

Some of you have given financially to our ministry.  I can not explain to you how many times we have not know where the money would come from in order to start this new work in Hamilton, or pay a bill, or support an event that we felt God was calling us to do.  We prayed that God would provide and stepped out in faith and God laid it on your hearts to give.  In all honesty, every time it happens I am surprised because you give without us ever telling you about the need.  And every time I am surprised I remind myself that God is working all over the world to bring His plans to fruition. Some of you give faithfully each month and some of you have given for something very specific.  Both of these sacrifices are significant blessings to us.  You are my brothers and sisters.  You are a part of our family.

No mater what role you have played in the body of Christ please know that your role is significant and gives glory to Yahweh.  I am filled to overflowing with thankfulness for each and everyone of you.

Thanksgiving Hike 2011

Rude Awakenings

There is that blissful moment when you first stir at daybreak.   You know the one where you are not fully awake for your brain to remember the long list of things that you need to accomplish,  or the responsibilities that you have for the day but you are content with the dawning of a new morning that feels like a fresh beginning.  I was reveling in that joyous space this morning when out of nowhere I was jolted awake by a fist in my face.  As the stars started to clear from my vision I remembered that I had been up in the middle of night with my youngest daughter who was having a nightmare.  Finally, in desperation to get a little sleep from the few hours that were left,  I let her sleep on my side of the bed.  Now, I remembered why I only invite her in as a last resort.

I tried to get back to sleep for a while but after the rude awakening it was no use.  I decided to go downstairs and enjoy the quiet with a cup of coffee and my bible.  It was still early when I finished my quiet time and so I thought I would get a few minutes to read the newspaper before everyone else began to stir. 

The Hamilton Spectator had a special report on the city's vital signs.  You can read a copy of that report here.  There was a lot of good news about where the city has improved.  Less seniors now live in poverty.  James St North has a thriving arts community that seems to be picking up momentum.  Crime rates are down and there is progress in the economy.  What I also learned though was another rude awakening about the poverty that plagues the city.   Child poverty continues to exceeds 50% in many neighbourhoods with an child poverty rate of over 26% for the city.  Another shocking statistic is that there is a twenty-one year difference in life expectancy between the poorest and richest neighbourhoods here in Hamilton.  That takes my breath away.  How is that possible when so many of us have so much?

So as my children began to stir,  I was left wondering what children in my neighbourhood were going without breakfast this morning?

 “Then the King will say to those on His right, ‘Come, you who are blessed of My Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world.  For I was hungry, and you gave Me something to eat; I was thirsty, and you gave Me something to drink; I was a stranger, and you invited Me in; naked, and you clothed Me; I was sick, and you visited Me; I was in prison, and you came to Me.’  Then the righteous will answer Him, ‘Lord, when did we see You hungry, and feed You, or thirsty, and give You something to drink?  And when did we see You a stranger, and invite You in, or naked, and clothe You? When did we see You sick, or in prison, and come to You?’  The King will answer and say to them, ‘Truly I say to you, to the extent that you did it to one of these brothers of Mine, even the least of them, you did it to Me.’

~ Matthew 25: 34-40

We have a lot of work to do here in Hamilton.  Please Lord give us the wisdom to do it well.

Facing My Doubt

This is my second morning sitting on our porch, reading my bible and praying.  I am being drawn out here where I can read God's word and pray.

God is doing something in me and I am restless.  Not only am I restless but I am a bit concerned about where all of this is going to lead.  Have you ever had that feeling?  I can't put down my bible and yet if I am honest with myself there is part of me that wants to put it down because I am afraid of what God will reveal.  You see deep down I like comfort.  I like my life.  I love my kids and my husband and my family.  I have been aware for some time now that the cost for me to follow Christ has not been high.  My parents did not disown me.  I do not fear for my life.  Our Canadian culture, although not joyfully receptive that I follow Christ, does not persecute me because of my profession of faith.  Our family has been free to leave our friends at a church we love in order to move to a new city to start a new church.  Really, in comparison to what others have had to give up in order to follow Jesus, the cost on my life has been minimal.  I love Jesus and my heart's desire is bring glory and honour to Him with my life but I have been wondering as of late if I like my life to look too much like the lives of others?

I am currently reading through Colossians.  Paul is imprisoned in Rome and although he had never met the people of Colossae they are on his heart and he writes them a letter that is speaking to my heart in so many ways.  The city of Colossae reminds me of my new home in Hamilton.  The mixture of backgrounds made that city an interesting cultural centre where all sorts of new ideas and doctrines were discussed, considered and encouraged.  I have found much of that same environment here.

Paul writes, "See to it that no one takes you captive through philosophy and empty deception, according to the tradition of men, according to the elementary principles of the world, rather than according to Christ."(Colossians 2:8)

I am really struggling with that scripture.  At first I thought, "Oh that is not me." but as I have pondered on the rest of the chapter I have realized that God is speaking very clearly to my heart.  By the time I got to the last three verses of the chapter I was beginning to see that I can very easily deceive myself in my relationship with Christ.

"If you have died with Christ to the elementary principles of the world, why, as if you were living in the world, do you submit yourself to decrees, such as, “Do not handle, do not taste, do not touch!”  (which all refer to things destined to perish with use)—in accordance with the commandments and teachings of men? These are matters which have, to be sure, the appearance of wisdom in self-made religion and self-abasement and severe treatment of the body, but are of no value against fleshly indulgence."  ~ Colossians 2:20-23

Ouch that hits home......things that appear and look good and wise to us are of no value?  How have I allowed the world and the expectations of our culture to creep into my relationship with Jesus?  What things do I do that make me look good by the world's standards or even by our Christian culture standards but really do not bring glory to Christ?  What would my faith look like outside of my Canadian culture? All these questions make me a bit nervous and I think David Platt, in his book Radical, really communicates my own fears best.

"I was now confronted with a startling reality: Jesus actually spurned the things that my church culture said were most important.  So what was I to do? I found myself faced with two big questions.  The first was simple.  Was I going to believe Jesus?  Was I going to embrace Jesus even though he said radical things that drove crowds away?  The second was more challenging.  Was I going to obey Jesus? My biggest fear, even now, is that I will hear Jesus words and walk away, content to settle for less than radical obedience to him." ~ David Platt

Yep,  David nails it.  My fear is to really examine if am I believing Jesus and am I obeying Him.  Not a lip service belief and response but a whole hearted absolute surrender to His Will in every aspect of my life all the time.  I want to be radical but I am not sure what that looks like exactly.  I want to live life here on earth always in response to Jesus.  I don't want to blend into the neighbourhood.  I don't want to cling to short-term treasures that I can't keep anyway.  I want every moment of my life to be invested in things that are eternal always keeping mind a mental picture of the day when I will stand before God giving an account of my stewardship of this life.  

So as I sit here I am praying that God will do the impossible and change my heart.  I can't do it.  I am just like the eleven disciples in verse 17 of Matthew 28.  "When they saw Him, They worshiped Him; but some were doubtful." And so, as I start my day, I am hanging on to Jesus' response to their worship and the last words that Matthew records:

"And Jesus came up and spoke to them, saying, “All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth. Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit,  teaching them to observe all that I commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.”

I Want to Be Fearless

"For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms."

~ Ephesians 6:12

I didn't notice the broken window or the glass on the ground in the backyard but as I gazed around our living room strewn with the contents of our drawers and shelves and cupboards,  I realized something wasn't right.  Somehow though my brain didn't put two and two together until Jason said to me, "We've been robbed."  What ensued from that point on was lots of emotions, lots of calming our youngest daughter down that the bad guy would not come back, lots of dealing with police and a finger-print expert and a great friend who fixed our window and lots of clean-up.

The next day I posted the above Ephesians scripture on Facebook.  My good friend Anita wrote back right away with this comment.  

"Stand firm girl....shield lifted high, helmet on and sword raised....."

I thought about that comment all day and realized that I had forgotten the context of the scripture that I had posted.  Yes, I had recognized that it was really not about the thief that invaded our house because our struggle is not against flesh and blood but there is more.   What I had neglected to make sure I remembered was,  how was I going to dress for the occasion!  Below is what I need so that I do not allow the enemy to use this to gain a foothold and to discourage me about our safety and security in our house and about our ministry here.   As I read God's words and allowed them to sink in I knew I did not want to go into this battle unprotected.

The Armor of God

 ¹⁰ Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. ¹¹ Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. ¹² For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. ¹³ Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. ¹⁴ Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, ¹⁵ and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. ¹⁶ In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. ¹⁷ Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.  ¹⁸ And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people. ¹⁹ Pray also for me, that whenever I speak, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel, ²⁰ for which I am an ambassador in chains. Pray that I may declare it fearlessly, as I should. 

~ Ephesians 6:10-20

I have to admit that I am a pacifist at heart and I don't like weapons that shoot projectiles of any kind...guns, arrows....automatic nailers!  I don't like shoot 'em up games or knights that fight so it took me a long time to really connect to the whole battle armor imagery in this scripture.  But once I started to see it from a protective point of view that God wants to give us all the resources and tools that we needed to protect ourselves then I really began to dig into this treasure.  I love that the scripture says, "Put on the full armor of God..."  There are different pieces of equipment that I need and they all go together to protect me fully.   If I forget a piece I leave myself vulnerable.  If I am vulnerable I can not be fearless in God's purpose for my life.  I want to be fearless.

You may not have had somebody break into your house lately and steal your things but you may be going through something else that is difficult or is discouraging you.  Don't let it become a stronghold.  As my wise friend Anita says, 

"Stand firm girl....shield lifted high, helmet on and sword raised....."